The Not Good Enough Mother PDF ✓ The Not PDF or

The Not Good Enough Mother PDF ✓ The Not PDF or



10 thoughts on “The Not Good Enough Mother

  1. Lori L (She Treads Softly) Lori L (She Treads Softly) says:

    The Not Good Enough Mother by Sharon Lamb is a personal, highly recommended account pf a psychologist who evaluates the fitness of parents.Psychologist and expert witness Dr Sharon Lamb observes children and evaluates parents after the children have been removed from their custody She observes and takes notes, assessing the fitness of parents in order to determine what is in the best interest of the child Her evaluations will either recommend that the child be returned to their parent or that The Not Good Enough Mother by Sharon Lamb is a personal, highly recommended account pf a psychologist who evaluates the fitness of parents.Psychologist and expert witness Dr Sharon Lamb observes children and evaluates parents after the children have been removed from their custody She observes and takes notes, assessing the fitness of parents in order to determine what is in the best interest of the child Her evaluations will either recommend that the child be returned to their parent or that parental rights should be terminated, opening the children up for adoption It is a decision that is not always clear.As many of these parents struggle with addiction, Dr Lamb s own son struggles with an opioid addiction, which makes evaluating other parents evenchallenging on a personal level Since mother s are often the ones being evaluated to determine if they are good enough mothers, Dr Lamb turns the question on herself, is she a good enough mother She knows the daily struggle of an addict to remain clean She knows the relapses, the lies, and the statistics as she tries to remain compassionate to those she is evaluating, while at the same time keeping above all else the best interest of the child And, as a mother, she knows that mothers always look for blame in themselves when their children make bad life choices.Individual situations and cases are discussed with an informative eye for detail and information about what she looks for and observes during various home visits and meetings The result is a narrative that is both informative and heart breakingly personal As a professional, she needs to have boundaries and keep a sense of detachment while she also has a plethora of first hand personal experience with an addict In concise language and succinct case visit summaries, she provides details and information in a controlled, neutral manner, keeping her emotions in check, while informing readers what she does and of what she takes note Her professional neutrality is almost at odds with her personal experiences, providing the reader with the sense of a dichotomy she experiences between her professional life and personal experiences Disclosure My review copy was courtesy of Penguin Random Househttp www.shetreadssoftly.com 2019 0


  2. Katie Bruell Katie Bruell says:

    Wow This was an incredibly powerful and thoughtful book I was interested in the topic after watching The Florida Project and trying to think about what would have been best for the family in that movie This book is a wonderful examination of what it means to be a mother parent, and of what society expects of mothers, as well I really loved it, though it was definitely rough going at times.


  3. Kayo Kayo says:

    Fascinating and also sad Great insight.


  4. Kimberly Simpson Kimberly Simpson says:

    A heart wrenching yet beautiful memoir about motherhood, attachment and addiction It gives an inside glimpse into the child welfare system, and the impossible task of navigating competing interests and predicting outcome Interesting book


  5. Daniel Cuthbert Daniel Cuthbert says:

    Every parent wants the best possible for their child They want to make sure that they grow up well, stay out of trouble, get great grades and have a better life then they had Not only did Sharon Lamb want that for her child, but her job is one in which she consistently analyzes whether parents who ve had their children taken away for one reason or another want this for their children And as she has experienced throughout her career, parents are so very often battling addictions or conditions, Every parent wants the best possible for their child They want to make sure that they grow up well, stay out of trouble, get great grades and have a better life then they had Not only did Sharon Lamb want that for her child, but her job is one in which she consistently analyzes whether parents who ve had their children taken away for one reason or another want this for their children And as she has experienced throughout her career, parents are so very often battling addictions or conditions, sometimes through no fault of their own, that challenge their ability to provide what their children really need And as so often happens, what you think only happens to other people, can turn out to lurk closer to home than you realize For while Sharon thought she had done everything right, what with her training as a psychologist teaching her all about warning signs of addiction, addiction still found a way to worm in to her own son Suddenly the judge becomes the judged From this premise, Dr Sharon Lamb takes a deep dive into a world of mental illness, addiction, the adoption system, and what it means to get and stay clean Through a number of her own personal case studies and experiences, she is able to put a very personal and interesting spin on childhood and parenthood alike Much of what we preach when it comes to what makes the perfect parent not only comes under scrutiny, but Dr Lamb examines how these expectations are driving many families to an environment that proves to be detrimental and in many cases, pushes families to an edge that many fall off of into the abyss What really gives emotional and additional depth to her in the moment type of reporting of the situation in Vermont is when she talks of her own son who falls victim to an opioid addiction that makes her question whether she can truly judge the fitness of other parents This is ultimately a powerfully built memoir that gives renewed meaning to the idea that darkness can happen to anyone, no matter how much you try or how much you do to prevent it I received a review copy of this book through a Librarything giveaway, but this did not in any way influence my review of the memoir


  6. Stacy Kingsley Stacy Kingsley says:

    The Not Good Enough Mother by Sharon Lamb was not really what I hoped it would be I won a copy of this book in a goodreads giveaway, and it sounded like it would offer an insiders view of what it was like to work as someone who could recommend parents be reunited or permanently separated from their children What this book actually was as a rambling assessment of other parents and children, and the authors own issues and regrets and guilt with her own children She had two sons who ended up add The Not Good Enough Mother by Sharon Lamb was not really what I hoped it would be I won a copy of this book in a goodreads giveaway, and it sounded like it would offer an insiders view of what it was like to work as someone who could recommend parents be reunited or permanently separated from their children What this book actually was as a rambling assessment of other parents and children, and the authors own issues and regrets and guilt with her own children She had two sons who ended up addicted to drugs, and often her stories about other parents lead her to some rumination of only one of her son s addiction and rehab process.What I wanted in this book was stories about the woman s work, and less about her life Also, she continued to state that people either were or weren t good enough I get that this was part of the title, and I get that she needed to make sure that people understood her branding, but it got tiresome At the end I wasn t quite sure what I had read, and I wasn t quite sure I had enjoyed it I, personally, felt muddled, like I was being judged by someone who only knew me from tests she felt were relevant In fact, proving how muddled this book was, there was an entire section on the Rorschach test and how it came into existence, then the author stated that she couldn t say any of the secrets about how they were read because she would be giving away secrets I rolled my eyes at that Her attempts at humor fell flat So, while I was excited to read this book, I felt it glossed over the things that should have been important, and it left me wondering why she had inserted herself into it so deeply I can t say I recommend this, even with the several good reviews that is had For me it was a little too shallow


  7. Amy Lighthill Amy Lighthill says:

    I endured court proceedings during a traumatic divorce and custody battle, yet I knew very little of the workings of that system, which I found terrifying and inscrutable the fate of my kids rested upon it Dr Lamb has written a fascinating, often tragic, emotionally wrenching account of her work behind the scenes to establish what she believes is best for the welfare of children whose parents have not been able to provide a good enough home, often due to addiction or abuse Dr Lamb recoun I endured court proceedings during a traumatic divorce and custody battle, yet I knew very little of the workings of that system, which I found terrifying and inscrutable the fate of my kids rested upon it Dr Lamb has written a fascinating, often tragic, emotionally wrenching account of her work behind the scenes to establish what she believes is best for the welfare of children whose parents have not been able to provide a good enough home, often due to addiction or abuse Dr Lamb recounts her own struggles to stay objective, while also revealing much about her own personal life as both a child and a mother She cares passionately about the children whose lives she will impact so significantly, and she takes that responsibility very seriously She describes in detail the strengths and weaknesses of each aspect of the legal process I learned a lot and I am very thankful there are people like Dr Lamb, with hearts and souls big, kind, and resilient enough to continue to do this incredibly demanding and stressful work Even if you are not involved in this particular world hopefully you aren t Dr Lamb s book will increase your empathy and sensitize you to the struggles that others face You never know what ordeals a young person might be experiencing Dr Lamb s own family has struggled with addiction and loss, and she fearlessly shares this with her readers This book is a gift I won t ever forget its powerful messages


  8. Colette! Colette! says:

    I picked this book up initially for the voyeur element how bad of a parent do you have to be in order to get your kids taken away I was not expecting a lyrical, introspective memoir of a professional career and mothering, with Sharon Lamb s emotion, doubt, and hope raw and exposed on each page She wrestles with the gravity of her work is she an adequate judge of good enough , in spite of the paths her own children took It s clear that she has thought about these issues for years, and abo I picked this book up initially for the voyeur element how bad of a parent do you have to be in order to get your kids taken away I was not expecting a lyrical, introspective memoir of a professional career and mothering, with Sharon Lamb s emotion, doubt, and hope raw and exposed on each page She wrestles with the gravity of her work is she an adequate judge of good enough , in spite of the paths her own children took It s clear that she has thought about these issues for years, and about the layers of experience and influences that color her own life, as well as those of the people she s hired to evaluate What struck me was how candid she was about her own experiences and emotions You get the sense she was not holding back while she wrote.This book resonated with me for a number of reasons I identified with Sharon s experience as a person raised in a working class environment who had to adjust to the upper middle class professional world I empathized with her as she talked about her son s addiction and her guilt about whose fault it was In her insecurity I could see and understand my own parents, who are dealing with their oldest son and his felony Those are among the reasons I found myself spellbound by this book, but it really was her writing that drew me in


  9. Susan Bazzett-Griffith Susan Bazzett-Griffith says:

    Half memoir and half nonfiction about the role of psychiatrists in the foster care system in the state of Vermont, the Not Good Enough Mother is an interesting, if at times dark and heartbreaking, look at what happens when children s parents fail them For a book that was somewhat short, this one took me quite a while to get through the dark subject matter is at times difficult to read, and the author s own sad story of dealing with her son s drug addiction was a double whammy in terms of depr Half memoir and half nonfiction about the role of psychiatrists in the foster care system in the state of Vermont, the Not Good Enough Mother is an interesting, if at times dark and heartbreaking, look at what happens when children s parents fail them For a book that was somewhat short, this one took me quite a while to get through the dark subject matter is at times difficult to read, and the author s own sad story of dealing with her son s drug addiction was a double whammy in terms of depressing material The addendum at the end about her family was also gut wrenching That said, Lamb details why some children are allowed reunification or visitation with their families while others are released to the state, what value a Roscharch test actuall has, what sorts of language used in case study reports can help or hurt a case, and how generational trauma, poverty and even just chance can rip apart or bind together families I can t say I liked or enjoyed this book, but I did learn quite a lot, and the writing was good, if a bit disorganized 3 stars recommended for social workers, and people interested in child social services or drug addiction s affects on families


  10. Faterider Faterider says:

    drsharonlamb wrote an incredibly raw and brave account of both her personal and professional life and how they entangle with each other As a psychologist evaluating whether children should be reunified with their birth parents or continued to stay with loving foster families, she questions the readiness of the imperfect birth mother, the inadequacies of the system to consider the complexities of human nature, and even the soundness of her evaluations She asks so many questions in quick succ drsharonlamb wrote an incredibly raw and brave account of both her personal and professional life and how they entangle with each other As a psychologist evaluating whether children should be reunified with their birth parents or continued to stay with loving foster families, she questions the readiness of the imperfect birth mother, the inadequacies of the system to consider the complexities of human nature, and even the soundness of her evaluations She asks so many questions in quick succession that I feel my mind whirling That s why I applaud how she strives to stay sane and empathetic in the chaos of it all..Just offering a no holds barred account of her work would have been enough food for thought But she takes it a notch further by detailing how her elder son was addicted to opioids Where was she not good enough Her pain crept into her already existing uncertainty in regards to her job which lent nuances and layers and texture to her story..And what a heartfelt story this is I felt like I have picked up a lot of insights on attachment, counter transference and the courage not to hide one s skeletons in the closet


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The Not Good Enough Mother ➵ [Read] ➱ The Not Good Enough Mother By Sharon Lamb ➿ – Centrumpowypadkowe.co.uk A psychologist who evaluates the fitness of parents when their children have been removed from their custody finds herself reassessing her own mothering when her son falls victim to the opioid crisisP A psychologist who Good Enough MOBI ô evaluates the fitness of parents when their children have been removed from their custody finds herself reassessing her own mothering when her son falls victim to the opioid crisisPsychologist and expert witness The Not PDF or Dr Sharon Lamb evaluates parents, particularly in high stakes cases concerning the termination of parental rights The conclusions she reaches can mean that some children are returned home from foster homes Others are freed for adoption Not Good Enough PDF Ë Well trained, Lamb generally can decide what s in the best interests of the child But when her son s struggle with opioid addiction comes to light, she starts to doubt her right to make judgments about other mothersAs an expert, a professor, and a mother, Lamb gives voice to the near impossible standards demanded by a society prone to blame mothers when anything befalls their children She describes vividly the plight of individual parents, mothers in particular, struggling with addiction and mental illness and trying to make stable homes for their kids amid the economic and emotional turmoil of their lives all in the context of the opioid epidemic that has ravaged her home state of Vermont In her office, during visits with their children, and in the family court, the parents we meet wait anxiously for Lamb s verdict Have they turned their lives around under child welfare s watchful eye Do they understand their children s needs In short, are they good enough But what is good enough Lamb turns that question on herself in the midst of her gradual realization of her son s opioid addiction Amazed at her own denial, feeling powerless to help him, Lamb confronts the heartache she can bring into the lives of others and her power to tear families apart.